Watch The Video You Be The Judge!!! Is it His-Story or History?

DEAR DIARY.....THIS MORNING!

I awoke this morning to a feeling of anger. I didn't understand it so much until my thought process begin to overtake me with why? I asked God why and it dawned on me that through all of the things I am going through and being tested with I had no one to hold me at night and ensure me that everything is going to be alright. And it wasn't so much that I couldn't find or have anyone to do so, it's as if there's not one person in this universe who could really understand the battles I have in order to maintain a strong mind to fight alone. Like I said I don't even know why I woke up angry, I just know I'm grateful everyday for God keeping me in my right mind. Which is driving me mad for whatever reason sometimes I feel like I deserve that significant other who is loyal and honest, I ask God why is this process taking so long? I'm not a perfect woman but my intentions are built on doing what's right for the sake of me and mine. I think it comes to a point in your life when you've gone through enough, that you aren't even afraid anymore. Courage to continue and stand takes over you and people begin to be afraid of you just know the battle just gets harder. I have no one to help me take breaks, take a load off. The people I have chosen or who have been placed in my life from birth until now are the cards I've been dealt. There is no doubt in my mind that this has already been written> God don't make mistakes we learn from them and move on. What really bothers me is for people to act like they know it all, because in a split second things could change your life instantly.This is chess whatever pawn you are on the play board is optional, but who's team you play ( only 2 sides in chess) on is the big question. If I told you my story you would ask me how I even have "sanity" I'm not on drugs to cope, I'm not out here killing and stealing, I'm not lying and abusing. With everything left in me I am fighting for purpose while all of these things were used through my trials to keep my spirit bound. Meanwhile, I try to teach my seeds a "history" that was stolen from me. I learn everyday a new piece of me that makes sense in such a powerful way, it gives me every reason to believe and know I was created to be this strong black virtuous  woman in such a powerful way so that it's going to only  take a certain kind of MAN/ SUPPORT system to hold me down.What makes it hard for me to believe if there's any support brave enough for black women period is the weakness I see everyday, and it's because they themselves don't know who they are. They let what is seen visually, materially and not seen spiritually  take over that's within. And I think to myself " they can't possibly know their own strength". I look at women and men everyday, and I've looked at myself from past & present experiences asking myself is this how I want my children to lead or be lead? I asked myself can I really do this by myself or do I even want to?  There are forces out here that don't want me to, so as long as I see the design for what it is. Expressing myself with my gifts and talents hoping  that one day a voice loud and clear will awake the people I care most about to come to terms with the reality of the hate that has conditioned us into this whole dilemma. But then I realize that the saying "many are called, but few are chosen" is not just a saying but a fact and being chosen is God Given. When you know that you're chosen they will try to take everything away from you when you ain't got shit, just to try and make you look like you ain't shit. But when people around you look at you the light tells it all. I realize I may be IN this world, but I am NOT OF this world. Even when you try to knock me down by taking my most prized possession (which is not even a thing btw) it takes the strength of a Goddess to hold it together to remind the enemy who has placed a crown over MY head. The eyes are the quickest way to see into the soul and when I opened my eyes this morning I wondered how long it was going to take the disagreeables to figure out there are 3 more sets of eyes out there just like mine which equals 6+3 insightful ones which boils down to "NINE ETHER" AND I THINK THERE'S NO WAY I CAN BE AFRAID FOR WHATEVER IT'S WORTH TO TRY AND TAKE WHAT WAS AND NEVER WILL BE YOURS TO HAVE. BY STRENGTH YOU HATE TO SEE  THE SUPREME BEING WITHIN ME IT SHALL ALL BE RETURNED TO ME!!!!

Revamp> Old Myspace Blog< Explicit and Real!

HOW YOU NEGROS TALK YOURSELF OUTTA THA PUSSY!

Current mood:aggravated

NOW IF YOU READ THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HOES AND LADIES WHICH IS UNDER THIS BLOG...THEN YOU GET A GOOD IDEA OF WHO YOUR DEALING WITH WHEN IT COMES TO THIS PROCESS. FIRST OF ALL I WANT TO SAY I HATE NEGROS WHO BE TRYING TO MAKE THE FIRST IMPRESSION BY TAKING YOU OUT TO A MOVIE AND DINNER. AND THEN AFTER THE FIRST DATE YOU EXPECTING BECAUSE YOU TOOK ME OUT AND SPENT A LIL CHANGE YOU THINK YOUR ENTITLED TO THE PUSSY ON THE NEXT ROUND. I MEAN THAT LITERALLY "CHANGE"....REMEMBER A REAL WOMAN DOESN'T NEED A MAN TO TAKE HER TO THESE PLACES IT'S NICE TO HAVE ONE DO SO  FOR YOU. YES, GLADLY APPRECIATED BUT DON'T GET IT TWISTED BOO. IT'S NOT THAT EAASSSY!!! FOR WHATEVER REASON YOU MAY BE THINKING THAT SHIT TURNED ME ON. (NO BOO NO...)
Secondly, I can't stand a negro who's staying with a bitch and for whatever reason he's not getting enough pussy at home. He thinks he can just make you the sideline chick.

 No Nigga No!!!  Ladies Do Not Accept this bullshit! This negro is lame as hell and if I were you i would be that bitch who gives him a dose of his own medicine. 

See pussy is power, if you got a smart head on your shoulders then you use his ass for only one purpose. Whatever purpose you choose that's on you... Just be happy at the results at the end of the day. I'm NOT judging. LOL

 But do not involve feelings because at the end of the day he's going home to the stupid bitch that's taking care of his weak, lame ass!

 Just make sure he never steps outta line with you and he knows his place. 

Because for whatever reason they may think once they hit , that pussy belongs to him. Remember You Did NOT sign any pussy rights over to this fool... Who would he's a cheater?....

That is if you know you got that come back...But your not obligated to do shit for him

 only whatever and whenever you feel @ the time. HE AIN'T SHIT BUT A LYING ASS 

DIRTY DOG SO TREAT HIM LIKE WHAT HE ENJOYS BEING...IT'S ONLY FAIR!

Thirdly, there are one's that are just all out with it...you 

meet them in the club. Always wanna tell you what they 

wanna to do to ya...Or should I say do to what's between your 

legs. 

That shit ain't cute talking bout how you wanna lick this

and stick that. Yeah, I know we're here dancing and shit 

you may think I'm a freak by the way I'm grinding on

the dick... 

but that don't mean shit. It certainly doesn't mean I 

wanna give YOU, some of this pussy.

So sitcho ass down and try it with the next chick.

Yahh NASTY!  You're going to do it anyway.

I do respect you though because you're an 

all out with it dog. It's only when you are hiding you're 

ways that makes it disrespectful.

At least your not in denial like the

ones above this one....AKA the Cheaters!

 

Last, but certainly not least....the certified way to talk yourself out of the pussy is to just think every woman is the same...SHIT ME BOSS... 

I'm not the average chick. I say what I feel and do what the fuck I want to whether your ass like it or not. You can't change me just like I can't

 change you but I will tell you what I'm thinking, feeling, and doing without a doubt and don't owe you any explanation for shit. I said it 

before and will say it again, Only God can judge me. At the end of the day if I didn't say that I love you than I don't give a damn what you 

do, but you will respect me whether I love your ass or not. I only live once and my happiness only comes once in this lifetime.  

SOME LIKEM HOOD, SOME LIKEM SLUTTY, SOME LIKEM SMART, SOME LIKEM SEXY

SOME LIKEM CLASSY, SOME LIKEM GHETTO, SOME LIKEM FREAKY, SOME LIKEM DOWN, AND SOME LIKEM BITCHY....

YES THE LIST GOES ON WE ARE FULL OF VARIETY AND FLAVORS.   BUT NONE OF YOU WILL EVER GO WRONG WITH A REAL STRAIGHT UP CHICK! >NO SHADE

BUT HONESTLY NIGGAZ FLAVORS IS BECOMING VERY SCARCE NOW OF DAYS. LIKE THEY GOING OUTTA COMMISSION

ACTING LIKE THEY GOT THE BEST DICK IN THE WORLD WHEN THAT SHIT IS TRASH. BE CAREFUL I COULD BE TALKING ABOUT YOU.

 I THINK I WOULD KNOW IF HE SENT FROM HEAVEN GOD WON'T DEPRIVE ME OF NOT EVEN ONE ORGASM... GET IT TOGETHER MEN LIFE IS TO SHORT

(( IMA NEED ME A THOROUGHBRED BLACK MAN, YOU KNOW THE ONES THEY USED TO MAKE BACK IN THE DAY))

TOO MANY PUSSY'S WALKING AROUND AND I'M BEGINNING TO UNDERSTAND WHY IT'S HARD TO FIND A GOOD MAN.....

THEY BITCHIN OUT LADIES....SCARED AND DON'T EVEN KNOW IT!
 
FIND SOMEBODY REAL, WHO CAN HOLD YOU DOWN AND YOU CAN HOLD HER DOWN AS WELL.50/50  THIS SHIT AIN'T NO GAME OUT HERE! > STD'S ARE THOUGH. 

FOR SOME OF YOU IT IS...KEEP SHIT REAL THOUGH IT WILL TAKE YOU DOWN A LONG ROAD OF WISDOM AND KNOWLEDGE OF SELF

AND BESIDES I ALWAYS SAY IF YOU CAN'T KEEP IT REAL WITH ME HOW CAN YOU KEEP IT REAL WITH YOURSELF?

 STOP RUNNING AROUND IN CIRCLES WITH THE BULLSHIT SOME OF US ARE LOOKING FOR REAL MEN >STRONG GODS & KINGS WHAT YOU CAN DO WITH YOUR TONGUE IS USE IT IN A MANNER THAT BLOWS MY MIND ALTHOUGH THE IDEA DOES INTRIGUE ME BUT THAT'S ALL

...BE BLESSED AND HOPE YOU ENJOYED MY BLOG, I ENJOYED EXPRESSING EVERY BIT OF IT!

PEACE.
  

note this blog dates back to August 2009 funny how time flys....